Day 65. 2012.

I have been thinking about this post for the past week and wondering just what I would end up writing when it came down to it.

Well, here we are, it's Saturday, August 11, 2012 and it has been exactly five years since I have seen this man...




I don't know how I ever thought that losing him would get easier,

that with each passing year I would somehow be able to move through this day a little better than the year before, but as time goes on, I realize that this isn't possible.

And although the ache isn't always so profound, I will forever struggle with this huge loss.

I understand now that you don't lose someone who meant so much to your entire exisistence and not feel incomplete when you ache to pick up the phone and share some exciting news with them.

A couple of days ago, I was given an amazing opportunity.

A chance to do something that I have always dreamed about.

And while I was squealing with excitement and calling everyone I hold near and dear to my heart, I couldn't help but wish that I could tell him.

If I could, I am sure the tears would be falling...

'Thank you for always believing in me.

I know that you would be so proud.

I can't wait to see your smiling face again.

I love you.'